Goodbye Christopher Sean.
So this is how it ends for Paul Narita. Not with a bang, or even a whimper, but a trip to one of those Soap Opera Rehabs that they send characters they don’t want to actually get rid of in hopes they can recast (speaking of, isn’t it about time that Theo was cured and sent home?)
Oh hello! It’s been a while since we’ve actually had a recap, since the last two months have consisted of a couple of scenes of Paul in the hospital, and Will and Sonny in their respective lonely beds rubbing one out looking at fan vids of WilSon on youtube.
When we finally did inch forward with a story, Paul was gone within a few days, making his long-discussed exit as anticlimactic as possible.
Will brings Paul home from the hospital to their “new” apartment, which is obviously just Ben’s old apartment, repurposed. The secret cubby hole of neck ties should have been their first clue.
The guys are are in for a shock, though, when they discover that the apartment is completely empty, meaning that Will arranged for them to move in without realizing they needed furnishings and their belongings? Oh, why am I surprised.
Luckily, there’s a knock on the door, and a friendly Jehomo Witness named Rett appears at the door to help out.
Actually, Rett is an old friend of Paul, and he’s happy to offer the services of his shirtless moving company. They’re experts at packing, unpacking, packing, unpacking, packing, unpacking … until the customer is satisfied.
After they’re moved in, Will needs a breather from the constant noise of Paul’s tires (every squeak is a dagger in his heart), and while he’s gone Paul starts unboxing and putting things away (well, nothing on a high shelf, of course, and the wall hangings will have to wait).
He comes across Will’s Journal, aka THE HOMONOMICON II (as you’ll recall, the original HOMONOMICON was the tome that Oliver Fish gave his mother to explain “gay” on One Life To Live). Paul is tempted to invade Will’s privacy, but eventually resists … because he’s Paul.
Brady , however, is definitely NOT Paul, and so has no qualms about telling his brother that Will is in love with Sonny, and is only with Paul out of obligation.
Paul confronts Will, who finally admits the truth. He asks Paul how he knew something was wrong, and Paul tells him “Every time we would talk you would stare off in to the distance.” Okay, but how did he know something was wrong?
Paul releases Will and tells him to go back to Sonny, and wishes them the best. Because he’s Paul.
He asks Brady and John to come over, and explains that he’s heading home to San Francisco to stay with his mom while he gets treatment at a special clinic for gay former baseball players injured from three story falls. Well, if there’s room.
Luckily, his mom has sent a gay friend named Luke to help Paul move, and Wingman Brady gets Luke to reveal that he, like Paul, is currently single. Say what you will about Brady, but he knows how to get the bone ball rolling.
Paul bids a tearful goodbye to his dad.
Paul takes one last look around at the home he’s known for about 48 hours, and we get Christopher Sean’s final scene.
Meanwhile, there is an incredibly lame attempt at creating suspense over WilSon’s reunion. Sonny takes off in the company jet to clear his head (the rich person’s version of taking a walk around the block), and no one knows where he went (except Victor, who basically tells Will to go fuck himself).
For the life of me, I can’t understand what the point of this non-mystery was. Unless it was so Will and Sonny could be reunited in the final moment before the show went on Thanksgiving hiatus.
So … Paul is gone, and Will and Sonny will have about a day of bliss before …
SEE YOU NEXT WEEK!